whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
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