chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
Randomize
