stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
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