I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Randomize
