Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
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