During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
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Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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