Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Randomize
