THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
Randomize
