Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
There's even glitter on my cock...
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