let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Randomize
