She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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