its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
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