My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
Randomize
