So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
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