After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
Randomize
