whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
Randomize
