Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
Randomize
