I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
Semen is not good for contacts.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Randomize