I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
Randomize
