you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
Randomize
