Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Randomize
