So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
You were screaming at a bartender last night for not referring to you as god.
and apparently I tried to pay for beer with a tampon.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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