That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
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