i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
