just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
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