we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
Randomize
