I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
Acid is not a monday night drug
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
Randomize
