Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
Hotel room at 3 am. She's 42. Stockings and heels. All because I opened with a joke about cougar hunting. We'll high-five later.
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Randomize
