I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
Randomize
