An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
Randomize