I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
Randomize
