Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
