ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
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