I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
So, apparently I made everyone omelets last night. Even when I'm drunk, I'm still a trophy wife.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
