i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
Randomize
