There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
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