So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Randomize
