whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Randomize
