Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
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