She is in my trunk
i haven't been laid since the bush administration. it's frustrating.
Some advice for success: 1) Go ugly early, it saves you time and money; 2) If you can't pork a princess, pound a pig for practice; and 3) Beauty is only a light switch away.
ur like the dr phil of bizarro world.
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
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