Got a toothbrush?
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize