so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
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