I just accidentally handed the ticket lady a condom instead of the intended ticket. I am now the official whore of Harry Potter.
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
I just found a bag of teeth...
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
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