I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
Randomize
