Yo dont text me then not text me
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Randomize
