Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
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