addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
They are going to name an STD after you.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
