That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Randomize
