is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
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