my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
