One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
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