worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
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