Im at strip club and am horny
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
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