And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Randomize
