oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
Randomize
